This one will probably piss some people off..

The next person I hear refer to this country as the "homeland" is going to get a great big raspberry and a card that says "Hello Nazi" from me. That's right out of the Hitler primer for crying out loud..Da Fatherland...Da muddaland..whoever heard of such language in this day and age? This is the earth, wake up and smell the oil fires burning and the flesh within them.

"Obama is such an inspirational speaker".

So was the first boy who kissed me. So was my first husband who abandoned our family. Apparently, so was George Bush. The point I'm trying to make here is that an inspirational speaker is what you need in church. A bonifide leader is what we need in Washington.

What is Obama's record? How many world leaders has he met and had the opportunity to know? To KNOW. How many papers and books has he written on his ideas and philosophies? What kind of experience does he have in solving world crises? In solving domestic economic crisis?
In going up against major corporate structures like the health monopoly?

They can say whatever they want about our woman Hillary...and boy do they. She's a corporate whore...please point out someone in DC who isn't...how the hell do you think they got to Washington in the first place? You don't get there without taking corporate money..ok? Obama has too. And by the way, if you own an SUV; stocks and bonds, buy gas for your car...you are a corporate whore too. Until we the people take the power away from the military industrial complex, we are all corporate whores. We are supporting a government that systematically harms and kills people for profit. What else do you call that.

As far as I can tell, we either need to dismantle pretty much the entire structure - I mean tear it down and start over...or...if we are going to continue using this system as it is, then Hillary is the logical choice because we need a woman...female power. No, she is not a man in a woman's suit. She is a woman walking a very thin line and no matter what she does..it's wrong. been there!!! And it's not just her politics that are wrong...it's her hair, her voice, her emotions...her walk, her hips. Oh well, I don't like Obama's voice, and McCain's chest hair makes me want to barf, I'm not voting for them. WTF? Does anyone see how ludicrous this all is? She stayed with Bill Clinton so they hate her, but they would have hated her if she'd left him..it's not Hillary ..they simply DO NOT want a woman in that office. Unless of course she has huge boobs and giggles a lot and does whatever the men around her tell her to do. I know..let's elect Brittany Spears. Ok?..because that's the difference between a woman who is trying to live her life for men and one who's trying to help the world.

As a Senator for my state of NY., Hillary was totally accessible. She was in this state...around this state...and every time you looked at the paper, she was somewhere trying to stop a closing or start a new business. If you called her office, there was action. Now I don't know what the rest of you want, but that's the kind of representative I admire...one who's working for us! I'm not saying every choice she made was the right one..but overall, I believe this woman has the wellbeing of this country in mind. And if I'm wrong..then it's all a giant lie and the only way it will ever be fixed is to burn it to the ground and start over.

So, say Obama wins. Will he inspire those that hate America to lay down their weapons? Will he inspire the oil people to stop raping the earth and turn to NEW energy methods? Will he inspire the money makers to turn away from their greed and start thinking of the big picture? Y'know..I'd love to think that was possible, but over forty five years of observation has taught me that they kill those people who inspire. So here we are with an inspirational President, who is suddenly murdered in office, (ring any familiar bells?): the country falls into chaos and what is the next step? Perhaps one the real power wranglers have been trying to figure out how to use for years; Marshall Law. Maybe that is the way we have to go...

Personally, my heart says we need WOMEN in power. You may say not just any woman...Hillary Clinton is not just any woman. Look at her record; read her book "It Takes a Village" and consider how much courage it took for her to try and go up against the pharmaceutical companies and health care insurance industry as first lady, to try and find a solution for American health care. Look at the way they ripped her apart. Why? Because she was trying to help the people? No, because she was talking about depriving them of their outrageous profits.

I have one last question, and I know this relates to a specific group in our society. Ladies; single mothers, divorcees, etc.; the last time there was a major crisis in your family, who stepped up to fix it? Most likely you did. Why? Because you are the only one there to do it. Where is the man? Like mine..he's gone. He's gone because the day to day responsibility of taking care of family and paying bills and making boring choices was too damn much for him. He was more interested in boobs, beer and basking in his own ego. I'd like to think this is a singular problem, but the fact is, most of the kids I know have been raised by their moms. Their dads at most, send a monthly check. Forgive me if this is the idea I have gotten about the committment most men are willing to give. You have no idea how much I would love to be proven wrong. I'm not waiting for a knight in shining armor. I'm not waiting for a hero. I'm not waiting. I'm working my ass off every single day, by myself and I have been for most of my life; whether I've had a partner or not. And what's worse, so have the majority of the women I know. So if you disagree with me..that's okay. That's your right and that's also your experience. This is mine, and I want a woman in that office who for once will speak for what MY life is about. Who knows exactly what the feeling is of being a mother watching a child being sent off to die. Of being a mother who knows what the feeling is not to be able to feed your child. That's what I want; and further, that's what I believe this country and this world needs.

Or are we building an indoor swimming pool in my living room?

It's not that I am depressed. Distressed...yes. A bit panicky even. I told you about my friend "Tim". So far he is doing alright. He has decided to work this problem out for himself. He's not having an easy time of it; but he is working. We have had some incredible conversations and for a child, and 19 years old is a child as far as I am concerned; this person has an awful lot of years under his belt. He has informed me that it was his choice to stop being a child at 12; that his parents had nothing to do with it. He was "bored". It was completely his choice to make the life altering decision to take drugs that could and would kill him. His parents, his school, his society had nothing to do with that. At 12 years old it was totally his responsibility that he took these steps and he is where he is.

While I admire his obstinancy to stand on his two feet - I don't buy it. I'm sorry, but what parent doesn't know for seven years that their child is on dangerous drugs? Especially when they live together. HELLO???? Is it me? I can feel the slightest nuance of mood in my daughter who lives 15 miles away. Is it a coincidence I call her when she's crying? Yet for seven years this boy says it's not his parents fault that they don't know what's going on his life. And I'm not saying it is. Fault is not the right word. There is no fault. No one is doing anything wrong. But nothing is being done right either. No one is doing wrong, they just aren't paying attention. Well I am. And he says he has to go through this alone because he's too mean. I guess I will have to be meaner. Cause I'm not leavin. I freakin have no idea what to do...but I'm not going anywhere until I know this kid is going to be alright. Right now I will keep his secret and let him proceed. But if he falters..and he can't do it, I'm prepared to go and knock on his dad's door. Maybe that's not the right thing to do, but I'd sure as hell want someone to knock on mine.

Then there is my girlfriend across the hall. A couple of days ago her mother called her saying she couldn't breathe and needed to go to hospital. GF laughed it off..this happens every couple of weeks, right? Yesterday they told friend she may have a few weeks left with her mother. A couple of hours ago she received a call saying she had better get to the hospital quickly. This girl's mother has been in and out of hospital for months..they give her antibiotics and oxygen and send her home. "Suddenly" there is a large mass growing around her windpipe....suddenly. How long is suddenly when no CAT has been done until now?

Other friend calls me crying; her 8 1/2 month pregnant daughter, who's first child my friend is already raising; decided yesterday she just had to get married TODAY and insisted her mom drop everything, including two important doctor appts., to attend her and her betrothed's joining in holy matrimony at the court house at 4:30 pm.; including the statement; "I will be very hurt if you don't come". My friend, who suffers from diabetes, heart disease, depression, anxiety, chronic fatigue, and a literal host of other syndromes and illnesses, was beside herself. Through sobs she said, "if I go I'm going to end up in the hospital; but if I don't go, my kids will never speak to me again." My reply to that one was, "Are you sure you want them to??" Maybe I'm wrong, but it seems like her life would be a lot easier without all that! Am I just lucky that my kids are more inclined to help me than demand I drop everything to run and do things for them? And I don't even want them to! I do appreciate it of course..I wouldn't have this bam shazam computer if they didn't - but I don't expect them to. I would if I were homeless or something..but I hate the idea of them having to spend their youth and resources looking after me, especially if I'm capable of doing it myself. I am blessed though..my kids are terrific! My son just finished an extended trip in Egypt; which horrified him. He can't handle sacred places being sold like cotton candy at a carnival.

So anyway...that's the condition of the seas Pye has been swimming in these past few days. Rough waters...

I don't even know where to begin this morning I'm so revved up. What a weekend. There was a constant stream of freaked out people in and out of Pye's place over the weekend. We try to find words of hope and comfort for them, but this seems to becoming more and more difficult.

I first want to attack the problem of the meat packing industry. I'm sure you have all heard of the latest recall, and maybe you have seen the video footage shot by two employees of said meat packers who were fired for their efforts to alert people as to what is taking place there. Horrendous pictures of animals so ill they have to be lifted with machines to be transported for slaughter. Well that's it for me. As much as I do enjoy a nice slice of roast beef now and then, I absolutely cannot condone the torture of animals by continuing to eat them. From here on out, if I buy meat at all, I will make sure it has been raised ethically and morally by local people I KNOW. Fortunately for me I live in an area where people are producing meat this way and it is available. But honestly, if I had to kill and butcher that cow myself...there's no way I could ever eat it, so why do I?

Pye's second question is what is going on with SSI? Every person I know who receives SSI has received notification that they are being re-evaluated. The girl across the hall from me, who suffers with fibromyalgia, a serious liver condition and a host of pyschological problems has been deemed fit for work. I sometimes don't see this girl for weeks on end because she can't leave her apartment..even to get her mail down the hall! But she's ok to go back to work?? I have also received a letter stating I am being re-evaluated. I was told I was 100% permanently disabled five years ago...I thought permanent was forever? Since then I have had additional surgery on my back and a heart attack...are they going to tell me I can go back to work? As much as I would like to, I can tell you right now, if I have to work 40 hours a week, I'll be dead in few months...no kidding. In two years, this fanatical housekeeper hasn't been able to do even half of the spring cleaning required and I've never lived in a house where everything wasn't as clean as a whistle. It makes me nuts.
So what's the plan...is this government hell bent on making sure that all middle aged women who have already given what they've got to give must now re-enter the work force at 55 years old or whatever? What kind of jobs will we be able to find? Who's going to hire us? We can't lift anything..we can't stand for very long...I also have seizures...I just don't know what's going to happen to us, but I'm scared. If they take my SSI away, I'm screwed, big time. I will lose my subsidized housing..and I have no car. I live in a rural area where there is no public transportation.
Is this how King George plans on paying for his war? By killing off anyone who can't pay their own way,...even though they already paid it? Everywhere I turn I'm given the message that I don't matter. My life is expendable and the best thing I could do for my country is die and stop using up resources. So this is the society we have created...wow. How do you guys want me to do it? Shall I hang myself? Find an iceberg to float out on..oh wait, those are all gone now...how about if I go to a zoo and get into a lions cage??
Well I got news for Bush...I will not go without a hell of a fight.
And what's more, I'm pretty sure the millions of women in this boat feel that same way. Won't he be surprized some morning when we all arrive on his doorstep with our mops and brooms and start really cleaning house...the whitehouse I mean.

We are coming for you George...and we won't be nice. It may be my last breath on this planet, but it will be a last breath worth taking if I take you with me...you and your little dog cheney too.

I can't say this is entirely unexpected. I feel as though my entire generation has been ignored since the very start. When we all joined together and stood up and said we didn't want the Viet Nam war, they pulled out the National Guard and started shooting at us...and what happened? Nothing. Our parents sat by their tv's and didn't budge. What kind of message was that? Well..the message was that we didn't matter...and that's still in our psyche. Is it any wonder so many baby boomers feel depressed, inadequate and abandoned? We were, for Christ's sake.
The thing that I'm counting on though, is that we won't let that happen again. We will not sit by and let them do the same thing to our kids and our grandkids. We must come back as a group. We are the largest group in this country...we have power...all we need to do is use it. AND WE MUST. We must stop the de-humanization of the American people. If this means we must occupy government offices just like we did in the 60's, then so be it. WHAT HAVE WE GOT TO LOSE? Believe me, I am against violence. I do not want to see a bloody revolution by any means..but...what happens when they start killing our children, like they killed us? I for one, will not sit back. I will arm myself and I will fight, no question. If that's what I have to do to save my country...I'm already there.

It was one of those days where panic and chaos ruled. Everyone I know was having a rough time and my phone had not stopped ringing since morning. Neither had the chairs at my table had a chance to cool down before the next body had plunked down into them for a talk with Aunt Susa.

One friend who had stopped by, a young man, seemingly without any problems, watched and listened as I wrangled a phone call from another hysterical friend.
"Wow" he gasped, "she was really upset". I nodded, saying I got a lot of that and that my friends really trusted me. The next thing I knew my young friend was unraveling his story before me in such a matter of fact manner, that it took me a minute to catch up with what he was saying. When I finally grasped the weight of his words, my heart began to sink into the floor. The inordinately bright and socially adept kid I'd been conversing with for the past few months was telling me he was a hard core addict for the past seven years. He showed me the fentynol patches on his stomach while he told me how much better he was doing now that he wasn't eating them any more. I asked him how old he was and he said without even understanding how hard it was for me to hear, that he was 19. 19!!! and he's been addicted to drugs for 7 years...that means since he was 12. I'd cry my eyes out if I wasn't in such a state of shock, and I'm sure I will later when I'm lying in bed just thinking. Where are his parents?? How can they not know their child is addicted to drugs worse than heroin and has been since he was in grade school for crying out loud? I don't get it. Nice family...divorced...dad owns his own business..remarried with two little kids, million dollar home; the mom is a real estate agent who has struggled with serious health issues for the past ten years..but they aren't bad people. And their son, whom I shall call Tim, is as bright as they come. A real self starter...has studied things that interest him to the point of understanding them on a college level. Plus he has such a way with people..he can talk to anyone and is pleasant and kind and sweet. He worries about his mom and always says he won't move away because he wants to take care of her...my heart is just breaking.

So he tells me his problem, and that he wants to get better. He wants to be done with the drugs, but he does not know how. He has tried more than once to get off of them and has succeeded physically, but not mentally. I suggested rehab, but he refuses saying he has no insurance and he is adamant about his parents not knowing he has a problem! He needs to be taken off the fentynol gradually, under a doctor's supervision...but will a doctor do this? Will a doctor work with him confidentially to overcome his addiction? Does anyone out there know the answers to these questions? I do not. I know nothing about drug rehab. I've known of people who have undergone it, but never had the opportunity to talk with them at any great length about it. "Tim" says in rehab they will put him on methadone and he doesn't want to be addicted to that instead. Is this the regular treatment? Do they just substitute one drug for another? What's the skinny on all this...I have to know, because I have to help Tim. I absolutely will not stand by and watch this kid get flushed. And I will not turn him over to a system that I know will not fix him either. I've been through enough of the "system" myself to know that all they do is give you a bunch of drugs and put you back out on the street. That's no solution. Tim asked for my help..and I know he really wants it. Can anyone suggest how I might go about doing that?

I would appreciate any suggestions any of you might have. Thanks so much!

Pye

I took my own advice and looked beyond my nose. This is not a sane world folks. I'm not sure how an entire planet goes insane, but this one has.
There's no comprehending the decisions that are being made at the top and there's understanding the behavior of the people below. The news each day is ever more bizarre and the thing that gets me most is how the news casters report it as if it's all normal. Normal if you live in Belleview maybe...
People are use to functioning in a world where everything proceeds as normal. You do the same thing every day...the status quo. They might complain about it, call it boring; but in reality it's comforting for humans to be able to count on the same thing happening tomorrow and the next day and the day after that. That's why, in this completely and utterly whacko world, people are just walking around as if nothing is wrong, proceeding as normal. However, inside the consciousness is screaming, "this is NOT normal...WTF!" and because the inner and outer consciousnesses are not on the same wavelength, circuits begin to pop and burn. This inner feeling of uneasiness...of creeping danger starts to brew and simmer. Most individuals assume it is just them that feels it...but in reality, it's a sea of disharmony and everyone is sloshing around in it. No one really talks about it, because they don't know what it is, or that it is pervasive.
Fact is, I've felt it since I can remember...always growing in intensity, always crouching like a hidden tiger waiting to pounce. I've always known that I would see changes on this earth that have never been seen before. I knew that before anyone ever read the Bible to me, or told me of prophecies. Somehow I was born with that knowledge, and was looking for the signs the minute I could use my eyes. but it is so gigantic now that there is hardly a human who can't feel it. The insecurity, the questions, the instinctive fear at humungous storms and cataclysms...the general feeling of unease.
What do we do?
There is only one thing that can be done. There is only one thing that might possibly change the course this planet is on.
When I had my heart attack a few months ago, the doctors told me the scientific reasons I had become ill...too much cholesterol...too much fat in my diet, etc. etc.
I thought about all of that, but in the end I knew the real reason I'd had a heart attack and it wasn't really due to cholesterol. It was because I was holding back love. I was lying to myself and telling myself I didn't want to be loved and holding all of that in my heart. That's why I had a heart attack.
So back to the answer to the problem...love. As always, this is the supreme cure for anything that ails. If this planet suddenly had an awakening of spirit; and consciously recognized that we are all family and began honestly loving and caring for one another; all of the problems would cease. I believe this would cure even problems that seem completely unrelated such as weather and geologic disturbances. Yes, this is a radically different way of looking at things than most people; but not the Native Americans. They realized the interconnected-ness and affect of inharmonious living habits many, many generations before us white people even got here.

And now my sister just got here, so I have to stop blogging and go. Have a good day people!