That's what I read in the headlines this morning. Thank god they're finally here. The question is, is there anything they can really do to help us...

I'd like to apologize for yesterday's rage against the rage. Well, not really apologize..had to happen. You just can't go around with that stuff bottled up inside of you...I do hope it didn't make any of you feel too uncomfortable. Don't like to add to anyones' already discomforted existence.

After a vvvery stressful week, Pye an I popped a few corks..and not the kind in bottles of sweet grapely liquid, although I wonder if that would not have been a better way to go..but anyway. Maybe this is the time for Pye to start drinking... catnip cognac?

However. We are feeling much better today, having expelled all that negativity and ready to see the world again from our rather skewed but affectionate point of view, [EMOTICON:GOODGRIEF1]] while we start packing for the space lift. No more than one bag they say..I wonder if that goes for Pye too..


So again, if you stopped by yesterday for a slice of good Pye and instead were battered by her ocean storm, we hope you weathered it in good graces.
I also have something else I want to write about today, but I will post in a separate blog. Hope you stop by to check it out because it's about one of those things I bumped into while I was out there in my ocean.

It's snowing here in Trumansburg. Even though it was 70 degrees just a few days ago here, everything is soon again covered in a blanket of ice in January in central New York. You'd think everything would die underneath that frozen crust; but it doesn't. Life continues stewing and cogitating even while encased in ice; and so it seems it is with 57 year old teenagers living on the brink of their own awareness.

Peace out
Pye's eyes

"Darmock on the ocean. His arms held wide".
Unless you are a Trekky, you probably won't recognise that quote.

Pye has been adrift upon the ocean for the past few days too..although not the ocean you might be thinking of. This ocean lies deep with the soul...a vast unknown filled with feelings and thoughts and images that both entice and horrify.

Pyewacket has been and always is drawn to the sea...but has spent most of her time playing happily along the shore building sand castles; shying away from the deep waters with an instinctive fear of what lay waiting beneathe the murky waves.

Lately her instincts and even her fear has been overridden by her
rage and her evermore disquieting need to storm and battle against some unseen forces inside/outside of her.

She and I have emerged from the primal waters shaking in our bones...our shared bones...the ones that continue to dance for her, but not for me. We have lunged at each other in an embrace of lovehatred and screamed within for each others' needs...each other's unmet dreams...until we find the screams are one scream...one need...one life. ONE RAGE against the cruelty of a system that takes away your strength and fitness just when you figure out what you're suppose to do with it!!!
GODDAMN THIS WORLD. goddamn this body. goddamn this me for knowing too late...for knowing too little. for dancing every day but never dancing enough...how can it be???
And so what it boils down to is that we..Pye and I..(Pye in my eye)..well, we're a couple of selfish broads - because even though we've danced..and we've climbed mountains, and we've swam rivers, and we've danced with the sun across the sky from dawn until the frogs wake up again and on into the darkness once more; it is not enough. We am not satisfied. We are not finished. We are not ready to sit down. WE want more..more...MORE. I - I want more mountains, more sunshine..more DANCING...and more loving. I want to make sure I've done absolutely everything in my power...everything i can think of to tell everyone I come in contact with..to show everyone that comes in contact with me..that there is only one way to live...only one thing to give...only one thing to live for! LOVE. and I want to climb the music into the air and fly...just one more time...(sure, that's what they all say, kid..)

I've been trying to refill my prescription for Lipitor for over a week now. Of course this was prescribed for me at the time of my heart attack in November.

There have been several phone calls made and several reasons given for the delay; they needed a new prescription from my doctor in this county (I had the procedure in a different hospital), then they needed the prescription from my primary care physician, etc. All these requests were fulfilled, yet still the authorization was not forthcoming and I could not obtain the Lipitor; which on the insert for the drug it says "Don't miss a dose by God, or your heart will seize up like the valves on your car engine", or something equally distressing.

After speaking with my primary care physician's office's receptionist (cripes, whatever happen to "doc") yesterday, I felt assured that my Lipitor would be waiting for me today at the pharmacy.

Ha haha ha.

I step up to the counter, after waiting already for 20 minutes. The part-time girl is there, who doesn't know me or anything else that's going on...and she asks the ceremonial question, "Can I help you?" and I respond with the traditional answer, "Yes, I'm here to blah blah blah", etc. etc. and so forth.
And she comes back and says, "there's no record of your prescription at all. Not on the computer, or anywhere." And I smile and nod and say, "Of course there isn't. Why would there be?".
She cocked her head questioningly and I smiled again and told her it was okay and not to worry...I'd talk to Alan (my pharmacist for 23 years)about it.

After the required 15 minute friendly conversation...because in a town the size of T-burg, there's no business before friendship, dear Mr. Tubbs decided to make a phone call and find out what the hold up was all about.
He is the sweetest man, and even when I'm running 45 minutes behind schedule, it breaks my heart if I can't spend those few minutes "chewin' the fat" with him...but he spent a few minutes speaking to the voice on the other end of the line, in his charming but mildly sarcastic way, and I was able to deduce quite quickly from my end and his side-glances that my huge and glaring mistake here was that I had the misguided and misinformed miseducation in not receiving prior authorization for my heart attack...[[EMOTICON:STUNNED1]
I listened intently as he very gently guided the person's mind around to the concept they were missing in the general gist of things here; "Oh, you mean her emergency heart procedure?" He has a gift.

So, I will have my Lipitor soon, but Alan also assured me my life is not in danger if I miss a couple doses..he's a good guy to have around.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it a...Pye?
And why are all her teeth showing?? I don't believe anyone has seen Pye's teeth in a while.

She's dancing and smiling...I think she has a new friend...one she never ever expected to have! She would like to share her joy with you, but she is a little embarrassed so she hopes you will just smile along with her.

(and no..it isn't romantic!) It's just really special.

Apparently the spirit who's been hanging around my apartment lately did not appreciate my last intended post because I got up for a half a second and when I came back to my computer there was a little message that said, "there has been an error..." uh huh. Let's talk about the spirit who erased my last blog entry then.
Anyone else experience "ghosts"? I know I'm taking a pretty big step forward in admitting this, but it is something that is intricately part of me, so-
I started asking my mother who the people were that were standing around my bed at night when I was about four. My imaginary friend was a lion and scared the wajimmies outta me the first time I discovered him under my bed. I don't really believe he was imaginary.
The first time I ever received any kind of rational feedback about the experiences I was having was when my sister Diane encouraged me to visit a former classmate of hers from the Batavia State School for the Blind. His name was Sam Lentine and both he and my sister attended that school.
Sam also had a gift that most sighted people don't have; he could read auras, among other things. Sam was so talented that he was given a grant by the AMA to research his physic abilities to diagnose and heal illness. One of the things he told me during our reading was that my solar plexus chakra was always open and that was why I had the ability to see disincarnate spirit, or ghosts.
And I'm seeing one right now...the little bugger. This is no doubt the reason my last entry completely disappeared in the flash of a hat...in a manner of speaking. The thing is...I don't know why. It kind of showed up here when I got home from the hospital. One night while I was lying there falling asleep, I saw a ball of white light glowing side of my bed. I felt it was one of the people praying for me, as many were. It was a very strong presence..white and sparkley. Since then there is this softer white ball..sort of playful at times..always like looking over me. It also has some sparkle to it..but it isn't as strong a presence...it's almost childlike. Well, anyway..I need to find some food for supper now.
I'd enjoy hearing other peoples' experiences; but please don't try to perform an exorcism on me. I assure you I am not possessed..it's just the way I am and from what I'm learning, it goes back a long, long way on the German-Lutheran side of the family!(of all things)
so, later alligators I promise I won't tell you if you have dead people following you, unless you want to know! (And I can't see behind everyone, anyway..)
Bye!